You Know, I've been Feeling Overwhelmed now for Quite Awhile and it is not Letting Up. It's Frustrating how Blogging can be at Times. I Watch my Hit Counter and when I See the Number of Hits Drop a Little, I Feel Compelled to Post again and it is not as if I do not have a Post Ready that I could Submit, yet here's the Problem...
I Know that if I was to Post the Post I'm Referring to, it would Open Up a whole other Can a Worms and since I'm Feeling Overwhelmed by Worms already on a Number of Other Blogs, it would not be Wise for me to Submit my Next Post at this Time. You see, here's the Thing...
I have a Tendency to be Overly Submissive and to at Least one of my Other Bloggers, even that is a Can of Worms, yet I'm going to Try and Explain this anyway. There is an Unhealthy Form of Submissiveness and this is what Causes my Stress.
Let me Start by Saying that I Expect too much of myself. Even the Expectation that I should Post when my Hit Count Drops can be at Times an Unreasonable thing to Expect because I can become Overwhelmed by the Commenters if there is more Activity than I can Handle.
The Reason why I Started with the Idea of Excessive Submissiveness, though, is Because a lot of what I Expect from myself comes from what I Think Others Expect from me. This Includes Expectations such as Don't Speak Unless you can Prove Everything that you say. This is a rather High Expectation for me because I am Slow at Web Research and even Arguments that do not Require Web Research Take Time to Think Through and Present to those I'm Dialoguing with. Sometimes I just Plain Fall Short of this Goal and when I am Judged because of it, this Causes Stress.
Another Expectation is that when I am Challenged, I Need to Offer a Defense in a Timely Manner. Again, if I do not Meet this Expectation, I Risk being Judged and being Judged or Misunderstood causes me Stress.
The Most Serious Excessive Submission Problem, though, is Caused by the Fact that I Feel Compelled to Respond Positively to most every Request that Sounds Reasonable to me at First. A Good Example of this is the Request that I Visit a Certain Person's Blog and Offer my Input. This wouldn't be so Bad if this was the End of the Request, yet Unfortunately the Expectations Continued and Turned to Don't say anything that you can not Give Full Support to within a Certain Time Frame.
Apparently, I can't Handle High Expectation Blogs because I am just too Limited in my Ability and Speed at Doing Web Research. This Particular Blog that I am Referring to has been Highly Stressful for me and I Never Should have Honored the Initial Request that I Visit the Blog and Give my Input. It was my Excessive Submissive Tendencies that Led to this Stress.
Some have Called this Sickness "People Pleasing" and what it Basically Consists of is the Inability to Say No. I Keep Working on this Problem, so that I can Experience more Peace and Less Stress in my Life, yet I Continue to Struggle with this Weakness and Experience Stress because of it.
I want to Apologize if I have Allowed my Recent Stress to Cause me to be Rude to at Least one of my Commenters. Even if such an Apology is not Required, I'm Doing it anyway because I have a Personal Need to. Don't you see, even Honoring a Suggestion that I shouldn't Apologize would be a Form of People Pleasing and I Need to Stop doing that cause it is the Cause of my Stress.